Comments on: Things are not always as they seem

By: tom

tom — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 23:18:48 +0000

I don’t recall any stories but I do want to comment on assumptions.
Yes we make them all the time, and it is up ch.
to use to either change that or ask about it first.

For instance, you go into a job interview and say you did not answer a question with clarity, so you either said too little or too much.
Either way, the interviewer just assumed something about you that may affect your qualification for the job.

It is up to you to ask if they understand, and even if they don’t say it, you can usually tell by the expression.

By: Suze

Suze — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 19:04:14 +0000

First impressions have their place in our lives, if only to teach us to listen more to our intuitive senses. First impressions come from an entirely different source than intuition. I wouldn’t have known to listen to my intuition without having those first impressions proven wrong.

By: Jena Isle

Jena Isle — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 07:51:25 +0000

I have featured your winning comment in my blog. Thanks for participating.

http://acampaignfornonviolenceontv.blogspot.com/
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Ian’s reply:

Thanks so much Jena! And for those who are interested you might check out Jena’s blog which tackles the issue of violence on children’s TV. A worthwhile campaign!

By: Hicham

Hicham — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 14:35:58 +0000

Hi Ian, I liked the story a lot

I totally agree that the majority -not all- people are stereotyped regarding others + situations, something strange however it seems that people are lazy to make effort to change the image when they find the right one!
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Ian’s reply:

Something about the ego finding it hard to admit when it’s made a mistake, I suppose.

By: Pushhyarag

Pushhyarag — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 04:27:03 +0000

Yes, I quite agree and second Amanda’s point. It kinda sets out the ‘guideline’ for a holistic approach. I’m happy she put the right one here.
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Ian’s reply:

Not there’s an idea … ‘Manifesto for an Holistic Approach to Life’!

By: Amanda Linehan

Amanda Linehan — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 02:57:49 +0000

Hi Ian – Thanks for passing on that story. Sometimes it’s hard to do the things we feel we need to do to be safe and also be open and trusting. Maybe we should always assume the best of people until we have reason to believe otherwise
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Ian’s reply:

Yes. Getting the balance between safety and trust/openness can be a real art. Even better (though I haven’t mastered it yet) not to make assumptions about people at all.

By: Vered - MomGrind

Vered - MomGrind — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 20:43:46 +0000

“Have you had situations where your first impressions were proved hopelessly wrong?” – yes, and it taught me to be very careful when forming first impressions.
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Ian’s reply:

I guess it can work both ways … positive and negative impressions proved wrong. Often a good idea not to make impressions at all as people change all the time.

By: carlo gabriel

carlo gabriel — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 20:42:19 +0000

When I was in college I had classmates who came from the boondocks – the rural areas where the quality of education is not at par with urban colleges. I rarely mingled with most of them because of stereotype impression I had about them – poor, lacking in education, etc. One time I got elected as class president and was tasked to raised money through donations for a school activity. To my surprise the ones who were most gracious in giving their share where my classmates who came from the provinces. I was humbled that day and I still carry that memory with me. A lesson in life that I will never forget.
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Ian’s reply:

Carlo .. thanks for the visit and the story. Striking how stereotypes keep us apart … and always warms my heart when I hear of them being broken down.