Learning is rarely a smooth progression and is inherently ‘chunky’. If I think back over my life I notice periods of massive learning and change followed by times of stagnation or at least only baby steps. How I’ve learned things has also been ‘chunky’, often joyful, sometimes confusing and frustrating as hell.
It’s something like how a tree grows. The rings of the trunk show how much it has expanded in any given year, varying in thickness from puny thin ones to nice fat juicy ones. Yet this hides a whole story of periods of calm, sunny weather, icy winters and violent storms. Each contributes something to the growth.
We learn in chunks and make step changes and I think it’s true whether I’m learning a new skill, a language (I wish!) or the continual development of myself as a human being. Sometimes the steps are huge breakthroughs – ‘Eureka’ moments where something that didn’t make sense suddenly falls into place, or something I just couldn’t do suddenly seems easy.
I had one of these ‘big step’ learning moments over the weekend as I wrote about in Living in denial. I got to thinking – what were the conditions that allowed that to happen, and could they then be replicated to provide a more regular stream of breakthrough moments?
Here are the 5 key conditions that I believe facilitate ‘big step’ learning:
1 Readiness
I was ready for a change, ready to learn something potentially profound, ready to take action – in short ready to learn.
That readiness came after a period of frustration, idleness, confusion and maybe I can even say a minor depression. I was noticing lack of growth, questioning many aspects of my life and feeling more and more ’stuck’. This period prepared the ground for something to happen. It churned up the earth to allow a seed to be planted. It wasn’t necessarily pretty or enjoyable but was an important stage.
It doesn’t have to be that way and looking back at some of my other big step moments, just as many were born from periods of great openness and joy. I was also ready but that readiness was held with a lighter touch and a loving hand. This time it was dark and gloomy, next time it might be light and joyful.
2 Seeding
There was a catalyst. Something happened that sowed the seeds of change – in this case I read something provocative. The ground was ready, so the seed quickly took root.
The article took 8 minutes to read and stirred up a very strong reaction lasting several days. That reaction was lots of questions and searching for answers and some profound insights. The questions, answers and insights were all mine but wouldn’t have grown without that initial provocation.
Seeds can come from many different places. I try to collect them (books, clippings, web bookmarks, dreams, people, ideas of my own etc.) because I’m never sure when they might be needed. This time the seed came at the right moment. At other times I’ve known where to look in my seed collection.
3 Environment
For learning to take place the environment needs to be right and that’s going to depend on what the learning is.
With my big step I read the article on the morning I was leaving for a few days in the mountains. In the peace and tranquillity of the mountains I had nothing to do and I’d deliberately left all work, reading, computers back at home and took only my wife (forcibly stripped of work, computer etc). I had been expecting purely to get a break and there was I had no intention of any major soul searching.
I couldn’t have designed a better environment – the pressure-free time and space combined with connection to nature was just what I needed. If I’d been learning something else I would have needed a different environment.
4 Nurturance
For seeds to grow they need care, attention and the basic fundamentals taken care of such as light, water and food.
It’s the same with learning and growth, the seeds of change need to be loved and nurtured rather than neglected or beaten up. If my child learns to ride a bike, chances are she’s going to fall off. I’m not going to ignore her or punish her for not getting it right! She needs to be held, encouraged and helped to see she’s still perfect and loved.
In my case I had Mona with me, who is an expert listener. No judgement. No criticism. Someone to share what was happening, someone to react and help me build on my thoughts and ideas. In short, someone to hold me while I journeyed on a voyage of discovery. And we had a great landlady preparing fresh, simple home grown and cooked food.
Also important is self-nurturance and gentleness with myself which allowed me to be with the questions and not force answers. No self criticism. No beating myself up.
5 Application
Learning can be a wonderful experience by itself, but ‘big-step’ learning needs to have a purpose or an application of some kind. The application might not always be obvious at the time but if there is none then the learning will almost certainly be lost.
A language needs to be used, a bicycle ridden and self development improve my life in some way.
I reached some conclusions over the weekend that have practical application. I want to take some action with them and I can see the fruit of the learning. It will make a change in my life – I’m assuming for the better.
I’d love to hear your experiences of breakthrough moments in your self development?
