Comments on: Sympathy or empathy? http://www.quantumlearning.pl/sympathy-or-empathy peaceful living Tue, 27 Jul 2010 00:27:01 +0200 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9 hourly 1 By: ianpeatey http://www.quantumlearning.pl/sympathy-or-empathy/comment-page-1#comment-14 ianpeatey Wed, 01 Oct 2008 07:04:59 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=235#comment-14 Hi Rodica ... these are HUGE questions :-) I love them! My initial response ... my feelings are always signals about something going on at a deeper level. The question is, how skilled am I at reading them? If I'm feeling anger or frustration then somewhere there's a need or a value not getting fulfilled - this is what I want to find. These needs may be hidden, for example, by my attachment to ideas about 'success' or my desires or expectations. So I want to bring those into my awareness, recognise them for what they are and look deeper to see what needs I am trying to meet. My point in the post is that sympathy helps if I want to remove the pain and not look deeper at the roots. If I want to look deeper ... then empathy is more likely to help. Ian Hi Rodica … these are HUGE questions :-) I love them!

My initial response … my feelings are always signals about something going on at a deeper level. The question is, how skilled am I at reading them?

If I’m feeling anger or frustration then somewhere there’s a need or a value not getting fulfilled – this is what I want to find.

These needs may be hidden, for example, by my attachment to ideas about ’success’ or my desires or expectations. So I want to bring those into my awareness, recognise them for what they are and look deeper to see what needs I am trying to meet.

My point in the post is that sympathy helps if I want to remove the pain and not look deeper at the roots. If I want to look deeper … then empathy is more likely to help.
Ian

]]> By: Rodica http://www.quantumlearning.pl/sympathy-or-empathy/comment-page-1#comment-12 Rodica Tue, 30 Sep 2008 18:40:41 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=235#comment-12 Nice to meet you here, Ian! I experienced the same feelings, but my point of view is a little bit different. To offer and obtain empathy we need a real experience, a piece of life shared. When a need is fulfilled a positive feeling appear. But what happen when a desire is not met? An angry, frustrated person, who claim that unmet desires make he/she unhappy, need sympathy rather empathy in order to justify his/her attitude.What you can do when you realise that the tears are born from an inauthentic need? Can you write/share your thoughts about needs and desires, success and happiness? Nice to meet you here, Ian!
I experienced the same feelings, but my point of view is a little bit different.
To offer and obtain empathy we need a real experience, a piece of life shared. When a need is fulfilled a positive feeling appear. But what happen when a desire is not met? An angry, frustrated person, who claim that unmet desires make he/she unhappy, need sympathy rather empathy in order to justify his/her attitude.What you can do when you realise that the tears are born from an inauthentic need?

Can you write/share your thoughts about needs and desires, success and happiness?

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