Comments on: Stop making me happy! http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy peaceful living Tue, 27 Jul 2010 00:27:01 +0200 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9 hourly 1 By: ianpeatey http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1588 ianpeatey Fri, 10 Apr 2009 18:56:43 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1588 My guess is that most of us have been down that route only to find it's a dead end. I really appreciate the comment and hearing a little about your story! My guess is that most of us have been down that route only to find it’s a dead end. I really appreciate the comment and hearing a little about your story!

]]> By: Jay Schryer http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1585 Jay Schryer Fri, 10 Apr 2009 18:33:23 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1585 This, my friend, is an awesome post!! This is a realization that I had to come to terms with in my last relationship. I tried so hard to make her happy, and I came dangerously close to losing myself in the process. Eventually, I had to tell myself (remind myself, actually, this is a lesson I had learned once upon a time, but forgot) that her happiness wasn't my responsibility, and if people are just determined to be unhappy, there's nothing we can do about it. Thank you for writing this lesson in such an entertaining and useful way! This, my friend, is an awesome post!! This is a realization that I had to come to terms with in my last relationship. I tried so hard to make her happy, and I came dangerously close to losing myself in the process. Eventually, I had to tell myself (remind myself, actually, this is a lesson I had learned once upon a time, but forgot) that her happiness wasn’t my responsibility, and if people are just determined to be unhappy, there’s nothing we can do about it. Thank you for writing this lesson in such an entertaining and useful way!

]]> By: Hicham http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1115 Hicham Thu, 26 Mar 2009 03:22:28 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1115 Very insightful, Ian :) I do believe that happiness is a personal state of mind, so it's in our own hands. Nevertheless, we are not alone and living in a network of social relations so sharing this happiness with other is something normal yet it depends on whom you share with! __________ <strong>Ian's reply:</strong> Thanks for the comment, Hicham. For sure there are some people it's more fun to share the planet with! Very insightful, Ian :) I do believe that happiness is a personal state of mind, so it’s in our own hands. Nevertheless, we are not alone and living in a network of social relations so sharing this happiness with other is something normal yet it depends on whom you share with!
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Ian’s reply:

Thanks for the comment, Hicham. For sure there are some people it’s more fun to share the planet with!

]]> By: Michele http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1071 Michele Mon, 23 Mar 2009 16:58:41 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1071 Ian, we enjoyed your article very much. Happiness is a state of mind and if we don't control our minds, who does? We are the happy window cleaners and our crew is happy or they fake it. That's the rule. Fake it and it will come. It's all in the mind and to release your mind to do its own thing is irresponsible. We CAN make ourselves be happy. We cannot make others happy. I am a truly happy person almost always, I just am and that's it. I have had so many people over the years get mad at me for being happy all the time. Get over it! I am what I am, and I'm an inherently happy person. Enjoyed your blog, Ian. LAL __________ <strong>Ian's reply:</strong> Welcome and glad you enjoy the site! I think happiness is a choice and a habit. There are many people who make the choice to be happy almost always and it sounds as though you are one of those people. Too bad some people can't enjoy that and get mad at you. Their loss I imagine! Ian, we enjoyed your article very much. Happiness is a state of mind and if we don’t control our minds, who does? We are the happy window cleaners and our crew is happy or they fake it. That’s the rule. Fake it and it will come. It’s all in the mind and to release your mind to do its own thing is irresponsible. We CAN make ourselves be happy. We cannot make others happy. I am a truly happy person almost always, I just am and that’s it. I have had so many people over the years get mad at me for being happy all the time. Get over it! I am what I am, and I’m an inherently happy person. Enjoyed your blog, Ian. LAL
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Ian’s reply:

Welcome and glad you enjoy the site! I think happiness is a choice and a habit. There are many people who make the choice to be happy almost always and it sounds as though you are one of those people. Too bad some people can’t enjoy that and get mad at you. Their loss I imagine!

]]> By: Whoever Is Happy | BloggerNewbie http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1055 Whoever Is Happy | BloggerNewbie Mon, 23 Mar 2009 04:05:39 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1055 [...] Stop making me happy! [...] [...] Stop making me happy! [...]

]]> By: Dee Langdon - BloggerNewbie http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1047 Dee Langdon - BloggerNewbie Sun, 22 Mar 2009 17:08:22 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1047 I totally want you to be very happy, I just don't want to be the one responsible for it. And believe me, you just can't make me happy, it will just never be right. sorry. I have been on both sides of each and every bullet point in your scenario and I don't like either side. I am completely happy with spending lots of time with myself and of course I like spending time with others as well. I am thinking there are a good many people that need to reflect on this so I believe I will give this post a little stumble. Great thoughts as usual Ian. __________ <strong>Ian’s reply:</strong> Thanks Dee! And thanks for the stumble and the link love on <a href="http://bloggernewbie.com/2009/03/23/whoever-is-happy/" rel="nofollow">your site</a> I think that's the route to a fulfilled life, getting balance between time enjoyed on your own and time enjoyed with other people. I totally want you to be very happy, I just don’t want to be the one responsible for it. And believe me, you just can’t make me happy, it will just never be right. sorry.

I have been on both sides of each and every bullet point in your scenario and I don’t like either side.

I am completely happy with spending lots of time with myself and of course I like spending time with others as well.

I am thinking there are a good many people that need to reflect on this so I believe I will give this post a little stumble.

Great thoughts as usual Ian.
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Ian’s reply:

Thanks Dee! And thanks for the stumble and the link love on your site

I think that’s the route to a fulfilled life, getting balance between time enjoyed on your own and time enjoyed with other people.

]]> By: Dragos Roua http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1037 Dragos Roua Sun, 22 Mar 2009 07:12:49 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1037 Thanks for sharing. Putting so much weight on "the other" is in fact the shortest path to being completely and thouroughly unhappy. Really, really good point here :-) __________ <strong>Ian’s reply:</strong> Nicely and succinctly put! Putting weight of any kind on another human being is not the route to happiness. Unfortunately there are many people willing to carry that weight and so it's not always easy to learn. If we were surrounded by people who won't take that weight then we learn much faster. Thanks for sharing. Putting so much weight on “the other” is in fact the shortest path to being completely and thouroughly unhappy.

Really, really good point here :-)
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Ian’s reply:

Nicely and succinctly put! Putting weight of any kind on another human being is not the route to happiness. Unfortunately there are many people willing to carry that weight and so it’s not always easy to learn. If we were surrounded by people who won’t take that weight then we learn much faster.

]]> By: Mike King http://www.quantumlearning.pl/stop-making-me-happy/comment-page-1#comment-1030 Mike King Sat, 21 Mar 2009 03:35:55 +0000 http://www.quantumlearning.pl/?p=1146#comment-1030 Great article Ian. I definitely think the pursuit of happiness has led many people to strive for finding that in other people, other experiences and other material possessions. It leads only down a path of even depend longing and dependency instead of finding it in ourselves and offering what we can without expectation. Great stuff! __________ <strong>Ian’s reply:</strong> I think we can find happiness in relation to other people, things etc.. but only once we've moved passed being dependent on getting it from outside. Thanks Mike Great article Ian. I definitely think the pursuit of happiness has led many people to strive for finding that in other people, other experiences and other material possessions. It leads only down a path of even depend longing and dependency instead of finding it in ourselves and offering what we can without expectation. Great stuff!
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Ian’s reply:

I think we can find happiness in relation to other people, things etc.. but only once we’ve moved passed being dependent on getting it from outside. Thanks Mike

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