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Vegetarian Living – One Year On

One year ago I stopped eating meat of any kind which was a pretty big step for me. Even bigger is that I’ve kept it up and now the idea of eating meat is just repugnant to me.

That’s quite something coming from a person who has a very limited track record of sticking to anything for long. It’s also from someone who was an avid and enthusiastic carnivore until this time last year.

I wrote an article last year about some of the benefits I’d noticed (‘6 Reasons Eating Vegetarian Food Is Best‘) and I thought it about time to update that and add in some new insights now the novelty has worn off.

1. Less Sleep

This was something I noticed almost immediately and it surprised me – cutting out meat seems to have reduced the amount of sleep I need. Initially this was 90 minutes a night but it seems to have stabilised to around an hour. Even so, this is a huge benefit for me and means I can either enjoy a slow winding up for the day or simply get more done.

When I wrote about this before some people reacted that it was probably something else I did that caused it. Obviously I can’t scientifically prove that cutting meat means less sleep and I know we all work differently on a physical level. Intuitively, I’m sure it was the cause and that’s good enough for me.

2.  Feeling Healthier

Gone are the days of an unpleasant heavy sensation in my stomach after a big meat meal. I remember it felt as though I’d swallowed a big ball of flesh that my stomach was having a hard time to digest. I find it hard to over-eat on a staple of veggies, rice, dairy and pulses. I guess it’s that they’re bulkier and fill the stomach faster.

I just feel better in my body most of the time.

I’ve stopped during the winter months, but over the summer I felt like exercising daily – something I’ve not done for many years. I’m pretty sure my running shoes will see the daylight again once the temperature rises and I can safely jog without risking a heart attack from the biting cold.

Actually I don’t think this is anything to do with a vegetarian diet being physically any healthier. It’s more that my mental health is improved – as if the act of stopping meat was cleansing in itself.

3.  Saving Money

Meat is definitely more expensive – both at home and eating out – and I’ve saved some money on grocery bills. I’ve also substituted some of those savings to buy organic and ecological where possible. I find it sad and frustrating that non-mass-produced food is so much more expensive than factory-made but that’s one of the wonderful results of capitalism and the market economy!

Ideally, I’d love to grow and eat some of my own food but that will have to wait until I move out of the city and into the countryside and have some land to use. For now, all food is bought and with another mouth to feed any day now, the small savings of a vegetarian diet are very welcome.

4.  Speed versus Choice

Cutting out a whole food group clearly has consequences on the amount of choice when deciding what to eat. I eat out less than I used to and the smaller number of options on most menus is one of the reasons. I’m not complaining but just noticing it. On one hand it’s a logical consequence of not eating meat and, by definition, there’s always going to be less choice for me in any non-vegetarian restaurant.

Eastern Europe (and not only) does not cater well to those who don’t eat flesh. Restaurants catering for vegetarians are extremely rare and on a typical restaurant menu I estimate around 95% of non-sweet dishes contain meat. That saves me a lot of time when choosing from a menu but makes it far less enjoyable to eat out.

5.  More Highly Evolved

This one is hard for me and a constant struggle.

I noticed it right away, I fight it, I’m not proud of it … but I have caught myself looking down on meat eaters as less evolved human beings. It comes out as smugness, snide and unpleasant comments to family and friends as well as holding my head a little higher as I come out of the organic shop with my latest healthy purchase.

That sounds absolutely terrible, doesn’t it?

And it is.

I hope this is a passing ‘obnoxious’ phase as I fully develop into, and own, being a non-meat eater. Most of my family and friends eat meat. In fact, the majority of the human race eats meat and I really do respect whatever dietary choices people choose. At the same time I can’t shake this idea that myself I’m now more developed than I was as a meat eater.

I just wish I didn’t take it further and make the leap that I’m superior to others. That’s just arrogant and wrong!

6.  I am NOT ‘A Vegetarian’

When people notice that I don’t have any meat on my plate I’m quite often asked, ‘Are you a vegetarian?’ as though it’s some strange and mysterious breed of creature.

Often I just answer ‘yes’ because I’m too lazy to explain but I really don’t like being labelled for anything – relating to what I eat is no exception. There’s no label for ‘meat eater’ (well, except for ‘meat eater’) so why have one for people who don’t eat meat? Lumping large numbers of people together in a single unified category is dangerous and doesn’t get us anywhere.

I once worked in a very posh training centre close to Brussels. They had a professional chef who was very good and took great pride in his cooking. He also had a belief that ‘vegetarians’ are crazy, stupid and a sure sign of the decay of the modern world. He reluctantly catered for them, but I was always a little nervous that he might poison them. I’ve no doubt that some ‘vegetarians’ are crazy and stupid, but then some meat eaters are not well balanced either.

7.  Separate Meals

While I may hold this belief that giving up meat was a positive step in my personal development, I’m not so arrogant to impose that on anyone else. I regard it as a personal choice and I continue to serve meat for other people (mainly my kids and Mona).

I also don’t expect anyone to prepare something special for me when we socialise. I’m quite ok to eat what everyone else is eating – just skipping the meat dishes. I’m fortunate that all my family are very supportive and go out of their way to prepare special veggie meals when I visit, and I’m really grateful for and touched by that.

Mona gave up meat at the same time I did, but her pregnancy kind of sabotaged that. I’m not saying that vegetarianism and pregnancy don’t go together – but she did succumb to a craving for fish and a little meat. We both believe that our bodies give us clear signs about what we’re missing, and she took the cravings as just that. I also spend a lot of time as single father to my 6 year old and I prepare meat for her.

I guess if my vegetarianism was morally driven then I’d not do that, but it’s not, so I do.

The downside, of course, is extra complexity, waste and more energy consumption in preparing meals. I sometimes wonder if it’s just pure self indulgence on my side but then I look at the bigger picture of my life and I stay with it.

8.  Do I Miss Anything?

I’ve not had any desire to eat meat from mammals.

I did pass a grill in the summer and enjoyed the smell of cooking meat – but not enough to actually eat it. I feel very comfortable with the thought that I’ll never eat cow, pig, sheep or chicken again before I die.

I do miss fish and seafood, though, and in particular sushi.

Not sure how that will play out this year and I’m just going to see where that takes me. I know from past experience that the more I fight something, the greater power I give it. Fortunately Mona doesn’t like seafood at all, so we never buy it.

It could just be a passing phase – or I may start eating a little fish now and then.

Overall this year has been a very positive experience and if anyone is thinking about stopping meat I highly recommend you give it a try.

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Knee Deep In Waste

Three bags of garbage today and it’s the third time this week I’ve taken at least two, 35 litre bags of rubbish to the communal bins – and the week’s not over yet. I didn’t analyse what was in the bags but my guess is that about 50% was packaging and most of the rest was food. I’m feeling ashamed to admit it but this was food I’d either bought and not used in time or I’d cooked and not eaten.

Partly a post-Christmas phenomena but mainly it’s because I’ve built far too much waste into how I live my life and I want to change it.

I don’t think I’m unusual. Most of us are unaware just how much food we throw out. I read that, according to the UN’s Food and Agriculture Organisation, around 50% of all food production is wasted. It’s hard to find comprehensive data on this but the financial cost alone amounts to, not millions, but billions of dollars every year.

The Food We Buy

Mona just came back from the local bread store. It’s a holiday tomorrow and the store will be closed. She said the store was crazy – full of people buying 10 loaves of bread as though they wouldn’t be able to buy anymore for weeks.

I know myself that whenever I go to the supermarket I’m always tempted to buy things I hadn’t intended. Supermarkets are in the business of selling as much as possible as fast as possible. It’s not good business to throw out food and it’s not good business to take up large areas of costly storage space. They make more money the faster they can move product so they want to entice me to buy a trolley full.

Money is reasonably tight in our household, but still I rarely know how much I’m spending on food until I reach the check-out.

Displays, positioning of product, pricing, special offers, selection and store design are all aimed at one thing – to make it easy and attractive for me to buy as much as possible.

They’re doing their job very well.

What are some of the things I buy I don’t need?

  • Snacks – I enjoy eating chocolate and cookies but I couldn’t say I need them
  • Vegetables and fruit – I often throw out things that looked great in the store but start decaying once I get them home
  • Baked products – things that go stale before I have a chance to consume them
  • Dairy – we eat a lot of dairy and don’t throw so much away but even so the odd carton still goes in the bin
  • Jars and bottles – jams go mouldy, sauces go off before they’re finished
  • One off items – ingredients for a particular dish and, even buying the smallest quantity possible, the rest goes to waste
  • Meat – no longer an issue as I don’t eat it anymore – but when I did I often threw it out when it went it’s use by date was up.

None of these things are unavoidable!

From a simple economics point of view, the less I buy, the less will be produced – or it may be diverted to other places where it’s more needed. Waste is waste – not just the food itself but everything that’s gone into getting it into my kitchen. The less I buy, the more resources available for other things.

Cutting back may be a small drop in the ocean – but every ocean is made up of small drops.

The Food I Prepare

I was brought up as a child, as were many in the developed world, to eat everything on my plate. I’ve lost count of the number of times I heard,

Think of the starving children in Africa!

as I pushed aside an uneaten mouthful.

With more than 1 billion people estimated to be short of food that’s a lot of starving people to be thinking about.

I’ve heard people say,

Better to throw it away in the garbage than throw it away in your stomach.

Well, this is probably true. It’s even more true that it’s better not to throw it away at all!

I had a friend once who always left some food at the side of the plate. I asked her why and she told me that it was a habit – it was her way of making sure that she didn’t overeat. If she left some food then it was some kind of check that she hadn’t eaten as much as she could have done.

There must be better habits we can develop!

Why do I throw away food after I’ve made it:

  • Misjudging how much to cook – I often cook more rice or pasta than I need, for example
  • Misjudging how much I want to eat – often I’m not as hungry as I thought I was when I started cooking
  • Overeating – yes! I eat more than I need to
  • Variety – especially when entertaining guests I tend to overcomplicate and make different dishes
  • Bad cooking – sometimes I over-cook something or just mess it up.

All of these are avoidable.

Of course, this food is also stuff I’ve over bought – so there’s a kind of double waste.

How To Waste Less?

Here are 10 ideas that have worked for me or that I’m going to try:

  1. Never shop when hungry
  2. Have a shopping budget (take exactly the amount of cash I need and leave the plastic at home)
  3. Prepare a list of what to buy and stick to it
  4. Only buy things with a clear idea of which meal they’ll go into
  5. Don’t allow myself to be tempted by special offers – especially those products I know I tend to throw out
  6. Buy fewer things with a short shelf life – more often if needed
  7. When cooking, weigh things rather than guess
  8. Freeze leftovers
  9. Recycle waste food for compost
  10. Get more creative with cooking and use of leftovers (great ideas on this site).

This starts to deal with 50% of my waste. Now what about the packaging …. watch this space!

I’d love to hear your ideas in the comments about how to cut out food waste!

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Start Here – Passion and Compassion

There’s a lot of sickness, cold calculation, hatred and violence in the world. It’s easy to forget the opposite is also true and resign ourselves to the ills of the world. I don’t believe I can directly or easily change other people – nor do I necessarily have the ‘right’ to do so.

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What I can do is start with myself and trust that it makes a difference.

There are three things I consider important:

  1. Look after myself
  2. Live with passion
  3. Choose compassion and peace.

1.   Look After Myself

Maybe you’ve heard the story (or similar) about the favourite uncle who lived to 105 years smoking 2 packs of cigarettes a day and staying stubbornly overweight all his life. The conclusion is the secret to long life is to smoke and eat a lot.

Clearly this is false logic.

The uncle (if he indeed was real) was an exception and not the rule. Long life came despite the nicotine and excessive calories, not because of it. Just because it’s possible to live a long life no matter how I abuse myself doesn’t make it probable.

Looking after myself improves my chances I maintain the inner resources for a full, happy and meaningful life. It’s about looking after my physical, emotional, mental and spiritual health.

It’s about:

  • choosing to put things into my body that are healthy
  • keeping in shape
  • developing my awareness of and listening to my emotions
  • constantly questioning my assumptions and beliefs in the sure knowledge that I can never be certain of anything (except that I can never be certain)
  • seeking out new experiences, people, ways of seeing the world, ideas, bodies of learning
  • finding and maintaining a spiritual practice.

2.   Live With Passion

860335_bungy_rideLisis over at Quest For Balance recently published an article ‘The Passion Paradox’ about passion. She writes about what she calls the modern day ’snake oil’ salespeople promising easy riches if only you follow your passion in life. She points out the same false logic as the ‘favourite uncle’ story – if Mr/Mrs X followed their life’s passion and got rich it does not mean everyone will do the same.

There are many people in the world who have accumulated a lot of wealth – and there are far more who haven’t. Wealth, of course, doesn’t define any of us as human beings unless we allow it. Passion is much closer to defining who we are.

As Lisis writes:

we should bring our passion into anything we do, with no expectation of profit

Passion is about how I manifest myself in the world – defining what I choose to do and what I give of myself when I do it. If I’m passionate about what I do, results are secondary. I might change the world. I might get ridiculously wealthy.

I might not.

If I do something out of passion – I do it for myself, not for others. If I live with passion – with all my resources – mind, heart and soul – the results don’t matter. When the results matter to other people, when what I do is valuable to them, I might get some feedback. I might receive praise, appreciation, and yes, perhaps even money. The more people touched by what I do, the more I’ll likely receive.

It’s about:

  • Knowing what gets me excited, interested, motivated
  • Doing things that give me pride and a sense of achievement
  • Caring about what I do and how I do it
  • Eliminating as many of the things that don’t excite me and I don’t care about.

3.   Choose Compassion and Peace

How I relate and treat the people around me is a choice I make.

When I choose compassion over hate I build bridges, heal wounds in me and others, bring gentleness instead of  harshness.When I choose peace over violence I calm things down, I connect rather than separate and I create in  place of destruction.

Most importantly when I’m compassionate and peaceful with others I’m also loving to myself. And that’s much more powerful than hate and violence. It may not be as obvious, may not be as immediate but it’s effects are far deeper and last much longer.

It’s about:

  • Valuing each and every human being
  • Reaching out when I feel like withdrawing
  • Holding out my hand not my fist
  • Taking responsibility for my life and not pretending I’m a victim of others.

Finally

Healthy living doesn’t guarantee a long happy life. Following your passion won’t necessarily make you rich. Choosing compassion and peace won’t eliminate hate and violence.

These things don’t come with any guarantees – but that’s not a good reason to choose the opposite.

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24 Moments Of Peace

Each of us starts our day waking from sleep – the most peaceful of states. Keeping that state of peace can be tough, especially as we bustle through a typical day getting things done. Even harder for those surrounded by city chaos or who work in a factory or an office.

I found one way is to take regular ‘Moments Of Peace’ – short oases of attention to allow the turmoil of the day to fall away and recharge my inner space.

888294_early_morning_sun

Here are 24, easily available moments to get you through the day.

Start Of The Day

1.     Before everything starts

I always aim to get up early, before the rest of the city wakes. You don’t even need to go out to feel the fresh energy of the new day. Whatever went before was yesterday and today is a chance to start again.

Imagine you’re standing with your back against an impenetrable wall and know there’s no turning back. Remember the rest of your life starts now, this moment, and you have this new day to take your first steps into it.

2.     Sunrise

The ancients worshipped the sun as the bringer of all life and heralded the sunrise as the daily metamorphosis from night to day. This time of day is full of expectation for the new day, cool before the sun brings its warmth, dark before it brings its light.

Watch as the sun slowly appears from below the horizon and gradually shows its face.

3.     In traffic

Sitting in traffic can be very frustrating, if you choose it to be. Alternatively you could let go of your desire to control things and relax into the uncontrollable. There is nothing you can do to make the cars move faster, no matter how hard you will it.

So stop willing it, relax your body in the safety of the metal cocoon you call your car.

At Work

1005499_alone_in_the_office_24.     Arrive early

I don’t recommend it as a habit, necessarily (though avoiding the traffic can be a huge benefit) but from time to time can be very refreshing. No phone calls, no one wanting your time is an ideal moment to be with yourself and your thoughts.

A few hours early before everyone else arrives can allow concentrated, stress free time.

5.     Mundane tasks

I had a period where I would photocopy binders for training courses I was running even though I had an assistant who was paid to do this, and more than capable than I! The repetitive and mundane nature of the work allowed me to calm down.

Find something with a rhythm, turn off your brain and just be with the task at hand.

6.     Waiting

Waiting for a meeting (or ‘not-waiting‘)? Put aside your impatience and idea that this is wasted time and enjoy the moment of no obligation and nothing to do but sit and wait.

Stop checking the clock as it won’t make time pass any faster, and sit back and let time itself hold you.

7.     In the toilet

Strange thing to suggest, I know, but it’s probably the only place where you can almost guarantee that nobody is going to pester you. Don’t use it more often than is biologically necessary or you may get stuck with a reputation.

Close your eyes (to forget the location) and enjoy those few uninterrupted moments of solitude.

8.     Go for a walk

Even in the middle of a city or an industrial park there are open spaces. They may not be green and beautiful but any change of scene, or move outside into the air (ideally fresh!) can be a wonderful way to gain composure.

Figure something out or just to take a short peace break.

Out And About

9.     Church or temple

Places of worship hold the prayers of the ages in respectful silence. You don’t need to have any religious convictions to use them as an escape from the rush of the streets. Here there is no space to be busy, just you and the divine. Or you and nothingness, if that’s closer to your beliefs.

Find a quiet place to sit and take in the sacred energy available for all those willing to tune into it.

10.     People watching

You can do this anywhere at all. A café, a bench or just sit on the steps and stop. The peaceful moment is in the contrast between your tranquillity amongst the chaos.

Sit and watch the people rushing to work, home or meeting as you take a moment to be rather than do.

11.     Watching clouds

We owe our lives to the clouds. Contemplate a world with no clouds – no rain, no plants, no animals, no food, no life. Lose yourself in the ever changing shapes and patterns across the sky.

What pictures, what messages can you see in the clouds?

281462_hug_a_tree

12.     Hugging trees

Yes, it’s a hippy thing, but just try it. Trees are often unnoticed, yet everywhere.  Feel the bark under your fingers, imagine the roots burying deep into the ground and allow yourself to be held in its strength. Ask yourself what events has it witnessed?

Put aside the New Age associations (if that helps), find the oldest tree you can and put your arms around it.

13.     Swings

I know kids playgrounds are meant for children, but we all have a child deep inside. There’s something deeply peaceful about moving without purpose, knowing that no matter how hard you push, you’re just not going to get anywhere.

Find a free swing and just sway back and forward, feeling the air on your face.

14.     On safari

If safari to Africa is out of reach then create your own local one. Animals of all kinds are everywhere, in plain view or hidden away. You can find them in the fields, forests, gardens or walking down the street.

Spend a moment searching for as many species of mammal, bird or insect as you can and remind yourself that you share the world with them. Do this with your kids for an extra bonus.

Anytime, Anywhere

15.     Breathe

Three deep, controlled breaths with full concentration on the in and out works wonders to remove stress, emotion and find the peaceful place underneath. When you’re tense your breathing becomes short and shallow but you rarely notice it.

Bring your awareness here and savour the air as it fills your lungs. Exhale and allow all the stuff you’re holding onto to leave your body. Three times. In and out.

16.     Conscious clearing of thoughts

Takes some practice, preferably a quiet place to sit and maybe one of the various techniques available.

Try this one. Imagine an empty sky in your mind’s eye. Thoughts appear as clouds floating slowly across the sky. The thoughts gradually change shape and slowly disappear from view or are vaporised by the sun shining in your sky.

800982_stop

17.     Stop what you’re doing right now

This is probably the easiest and the hardest at the same time. Most of us keep busy all the time and find it very difficult to get out of it. A time of no tasks, no movement, no thoughts.

Just stop! Everything. Allow the wave of time to pass without responding to the impulse to surf it.

18.     Count to ten

It’s a cliché, I know, but it does work. A conscious, slow count from one to ten provides a rhythm and an inner slowing down. Don’t rush it and do count all those numbers to feel the stress fall away bit by bit with each number.

One … two … three … four … five … six … seven … eight … nine … ten.

At Home

19.     Doing the chores

Most chores can be turned into a meditative routine and so present an opportunity to switch brain to off and lose yourself in the task.

Ironing, washing up or washing the car require almost zero brainpower – use them to turn brain off.

20.     Sunset

Watch as the sun slowly disappears below the horizon and gradually hides its face. As the day draws to a close, remember what the day has brought you. Things to be grateful for, things to mourn over, things gained, things lost.

Who touched you in some way during this day? Who did you touch in some way?

1165884_water_drops21.     Cleaning your body

Take a long hot bath, a short shower or just a moment to splash cold water on your face and allow your tension and troubles to be washed away with the dirt. Enjoy the freshness outside and inside.

Imagine everything that weighs you down right now disappearing into the drains with the water – flowing far, far away until they are gone.

22.     Gazing into eyes

They say that our eyes are the window to our souls. Our souls are beyond all the cares and worries of our physical world and, while we may not always be in touch with our own, we can access that place through the eyes of another.

Gaze deeply into the eyes of one you love and be transported to a place where there is only peace and tranquility.

23.     Hug

Consider how much peace there is in the innocence of a hug. Or how much peace in the safety you give in your hug. No expectation, no attempt to get anything – just the desire for two people to be close and wrapped in each other’s warmth.

Hug someone close to you and the moment you would normally break the embrace, stay with it and go deeper into that physical connection.

24.     When all is done

That moment at the end of the day when all is done. Chores are finished, computer is off, TV is shut down, lights are going off, bathroom routine finished. Before settling down to sleep take a moment to allow the days’ activities to fall away.

Nothing is left for the day …

… only peace.

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10 Books That Shook My World

Books are an important part of my life and I read a lot, though not as much as I’d like. A few rare books I wish I hadn’t bothered with, but mostly I’m selective about what I buy and rely on recommendations from those I trust.

From time to time I read a book that changes my life in a big way.

339265_old_books

These are the ten inspirational books that changed my life – in more or less the order they came into my hands.

It’s a uniquely personal list and I’m certain your own list would be very different.

I’m not saying these are all great works, or suggesting they would change your life as they did mine – each came and spoke to me at a particular time and place. If they’d come at another moment in my life, they would have joined the category of ‘interesting, useful or inspiring’ but not made it to this top category of ‘books that changed my life’.

With each I’ve provided a summary (adapted from various sources) as well as my favourite quote and a link to Amazon if you want know more (or even buy it).

1 Jane Eyre   (Charlotte Brontë)9780141441146

I read this in my late teens and, after being an avid reader as a child, had almost given up on books for the lure of the TV screen. It was this novel that got me interested in reading again. I touched for the first time how storytelling can pull you in and take you on an emotional ride.

For those who assume it’s a ‘girl’s book’ I can tell you I lent it to a friend at the time. He was from a mining town in the North of England and there was definitely nothing ‘girlie’ about him. The book made him cry.

In brief

Partly autobiographical, the novel goes through five stages of Jane’s life: her childhood, where she’s emotionally abused by her aunt and cousins; her education, which is tough but where she makes friends; her time as the governess of a Manor, where she falls in love with Rochester, her employer; her time with the Rivers family, where her cousin proposes to her; and her reunion with and marriage to Rochester.

Favourite quote

Prejudices, it is well known, are most difficult to eradicate from the heart whose soil has never been loosened or fertilised by education: they grow there, firm as weeds among stones.

‘Jane Eyre’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

2    Grapes Of Wrath   (John Steinbeck)9780140292923

I remember reading the last page and not being able to move or speak for what seemed like hours. It was my first glimpse of what terrible things we can do to each other and yet still impossible to quash the bright spark of humanity. I still find the final page emotionally devastating.

In brief

Set during the Great Depression, the novel focuses on a poor family of share-croppers, the Joads, driven from their Oklahoma home by drought, economic hardship, and changes in the agriculture industry. In a desperate situation, they set out for California along with thousands of other “Okies” in search of land and jobs.

Favourite quote

How can you frighten a man whose hunger is not only in his own cramped stomach but in the wretched bellies of his children? You can’t scare him – he has known a fear beyond every other.

‘Grapes of Wrath’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

3   The Alchemist   (Paolo Coelho)9780722532935

It came to me at a time when I was searching all over the place for peace and happiness in my life. Everything seemed a struggle as my focus was ‘over there’ and definitely not in the places I was and the people I was with.

It was this book that opened my eyes to a wealth of literary treasures coming out of South America as well as relating some of my own life through a beautiful fable.

In brief

Tells the story of a young shepherd named Santiago who finds a treasure beyond his wildest dreams. Along the way, he learns to listen to his heart and, more importantly, realizes that his dreams, or his Personal Legend, are not just his but part of the Soul of the Universe.

Favourite quote

When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.

‘The Alchemist’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

4   Loving What Is (Byron Katie)9780712629300

I first heard about Byron Katie from a friend who was very enthusiastic about her Work, so I bought the book. I was still fighting with the reality of how I’d constructed my life and using the method in this book took away all that stress and anguish (well most of it).

If you’ve not come across the Work before then there are several great videos on YouTube.

In brief

The basis of the book is a series of four questions addressed to your assumptions. Starting with, “Is it true?” and continuing with explorations of “Who would you be without that thought?” the method aims to get through unhelpful preconceptions and find peace. An integral part of the process is “turning the thought around,” where you’ll find an acceptance of reality, beyond questions of fault and blame.

Favourite quote

I realized that it’s insane to oppose it. When I argue with reality, I lose—but only 100% of the time. How do I know that the wind should blow? It’s blowing!

‘Loving What Is’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

5   A Brief History of Everything   (Ken Wilber)9780717132331

Not an easy read at all – even for someone as intelligent as me (haha). I read it at a time when I was looking for my own understanding of spirituality and my place in the universe. It didn’t give me an answer to that question but did give me a new way of looking at the universe that has been incredibly supportive in my search.

It’s one of the few books that pushed me to the limit of my mental capacity.

In brief

Wilber examines the course of evolution as the unfolding manifestation of Spirit, from matter to life to mind, including the higher stages of spiritual evolution, when Spirit becomes conscious of itself. In each of these domains of evolution, he finds recurring patterns, and by looking at these patterns, learn much about the predicament of our world and the direction humanity must take if global transformation is to become a reality

Favourite quote

I don’t mean to be crude, but it appears that testosterone basically has two, and only two, major drives: f*** it or kill it.

‘A Brief History Of Everything’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

6   Long Walk To Freedom     (Nelson Mandela)9780349106533

I grew up believing the media line that, while apartheid was a monstrous invention, Mandela was a terrorist and should be in prison. From a historical point of view this was probably because the British government was refusing to have anything to do with the IRA and so were nervous of any attempt to turn freedom fighters, guerillas or terrorists into heroes. Mandela became one of my heroes.

This book inspired me to see that non-violent struggle is the only way to lasting social change, and that the media, no matter how much freedom of speech I have, is an extension of the State.

In brief

Nelson Mandela’s autobiography describing his early life, coming of age, education and 27 years in prison. The last chapters of the book describe his political ascension, and his belief that the struggle continues against apartheid in South Africa.

Favourite quote

No one truly knows a nation until one has been inside its jails. A nation should not be judged by how it treats its highest citizens but its lowest ones.

‘Long Walk To Freedom’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

7   The Power Of Now     (Eckhart Tolle)9780340733509

I find it hard to explain why this had such an impact on me – I hardly remember the details of the book at all. I can picture, however, exactly where I was when I was reading it – down to the details of what I was eating, smelling, experiencing. Somehow it brought me into the present (the Now) in a very subtle but powerful way. It stays with me to this day.

In brief

Living in the now is the truest path to happiness and enlightenment. (I told you I couldn’t remember much about the content!)

Favourite quote

You can always cope with the now, but you can never cope with the future – nor do you have to. The answer, the strength, the right action or the resource will be there when you need it, not before, not after.

‘The Power Of Now’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

8   No Logo    (Naomi Klein)9780006530404

I love books that my challenge my view of the world and this one turned it upside down. I’d grown up in the corporate world and never considered what might lay under the surface. This opened my eyes in a way that I can never close them again. It made me much more conscious of the impact of the corporate takeover of the world and my role in it.

In brief

Builds an angry and funny case against branding in general and several large North American companies in particular, notably Gap, Microsoft and Starbucks. What should be a time of consumer choice and interactive communication has not materialized. Instead, huge corporations treat the world as a giant marketing opportunity. These companies have harmed culture and workers both in the Developing World and at home.

Favourite quote

There are already ads on benches in national parks as well as on library cards in public libraries, and in December 1998 NASA announced plans to solicit ads on its space stations. Pepsi’s ongoing threat to project its logo onto the moon’s surface hasn’t yet materialized…

‘No Logo’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

9   The Prophet    (Kahlil Gibran)9780330319720

Beautiful, lyrical and wise. I learned many things from this book, and I think the verses on children are the ones I find most powerful. On every line of every page there’s a treat to be relished and savoured and it’s the one book I recommend everyone to read.

So read it.

In brief

Essentially a work of spiritual poetry, it contains Gibran’s philosophy on major concepts in human life, such as love, joy, self-knowledge, freedom, Law, religion, and reason.

Favourite quote

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

‘The Prophet’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

10   Maturity     (Osho)9780312205614

Osho is something of a mystery to me. Spiritual teacher owning a large fleet of Rolls Royce’s and deported from the USA – yet some of his writings are amazing. This is the one that spoke to me and I read this as I was coming up to 45 (one of the transition markers) and it helped me understand many of the things that I’d been working with during what might be described as my mid-life crisis. I probably wouldn’t have started this blog if it hadn’t been for this book.

In brief

Osho takes us back to the roots of what it means to grow up rather than just to grow old and explores the benefits in accepting the ageing process as natural, rather than trying to hold on to youth . Both in our relationships with others, and in the fulfilment of our own individual destinies, he reminds us of the pleasures that only true maturity can bring. He outlines the ten major growth cycles in human life, from the self-centred universe of the preschooler to the flowering of wisdom and compassion in old age.

Favourite quote

Listen to your being. It is continuously giving you hints; it is a still, small voice. It does not shout at you, that is true. And if you are a little silent you will start feeling your way.

‘Maturity’ at Amazon US or Amazon UK

Notes about Amazon

1 I’m currently working on setting up an Amazon aStore to replace the box on the right (which I don’t much like). I’m going to put in one place all the books I recommend and I’m hoping it will be a useful addition to the site.

2 I personally use Amazon a lot as I find them reliable, easy to use and I enjoy the reviews and information they give. I also have an Affiliate account with them (as do many bloggers). Obviously I recommend you read these books – and if you choose to buy after clicking the links then I get a small commission from Amazon (in fact, the commission covers your entire order – not only from the books above).

I understand if that’s not OK with you – in which case don’t buy through the links above!

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