Personally I believe we are peaceful by nature – in that we are more naturally inclined to community and co-operation rather than violence. Many studies back this up (though of course there are also studies that prove the opposite). Physically we are not well equipped for violence (look at our hands, our teeth .. not exactly features of hunters). Our brains are our most violent feature .. which means (in my opinion) we’ve learned violence as a behaviour rather than it being natural. And it seems we’ve learned it in the last 10 – 15,000 years – which is a very small proportion of the total time we’ve been around.

My hope is that if we’ve learned violence – we can unlearn it. Many of those involved with NVC are working to change how we educate our children – with many success stories. It’s often called ‘giraffe language’ and there are many ‘giraffe schools’ around the world. I hear from those working with kids that they learn peaceful conflict resolution very easily – it’s the parents that have a hard time unlearning their bad habits.

A few thoughts to add to Evan’s response about ‘how’.

1 Start with myself.

Am I resolving conflicts in my day to day life in a peaceful and loving way? If not, learn how to do it and do it.

2 Voting with our money.

We are all supporting war and violence by paying taxes to our governments that’s spent on arms, archaic ‘justice’ systems and education of our children. If we choose to continue paying for these things then we have a right to communicate clearly how we want that money spent – and how not. Write and lobby to get our voices heard. Ask for changes in how government spends money on arms, for moves to ‘restorative justice’ and changes to education.

Find out the source of the things you buy and avoid buying from companies that use or support violence.

3 Voting with our time

Stop watching TV shows and films that promote violence as entertainment. Stop watching/reading news broadcasts that focus on war and violence. The media is very sensitive to ratings and viewing figures.

I’m certain there are many other things we can do .. these are just off the top of my head.

I resonate with that feeling of frustration. Once I realised how easy it is, and how possible, my thought is ‘Why doesn’t everyone see it the same way?’ Not everyone does see it that way, and that’s where patience and determination to show the way comes in.

I think it’s possible for our instincts to be satisfied in peaceful ways (sometimes using symbolism, sometimes by controlling the violence – sport and so on).