1 It’s often a cynical attempt to lure readers into thinking they they might get a nice shopping list of things that will make their life wonderful. Still you need to go out and actually buy the stuff on the list (and make sure you remember to take it with you in the first place)
2 Everyone else is doing it so it’s just not original
3 The number on the list is usually rounded to make it nice and neat. Life’s not neat like that. Who decided there are only 10 reasons? Me in this case, and what do I know?
4 Lists are linear and that’s not how the brain works
5 In trying to fill up space, lists pad out with unhelpful, really obvious or throw away items
6 The same item is often repeated in the hope no-one notices
7 My niche area doesn’t really lend itself to lists so I’m jealous (and that sucks)
8 The same item is often repeated in the hope no-one notices (I know!!! That was a really CHEAP joke!)
9 Once you reach your randomly allocated, nice neat number, you stop. Thinking stops. Creativity stops
10 Sometimes number 9 happens before you even reach the final number and then you just look stupid.
Of course you may have thoughtful, creative readers who add extra items in the comments section …
Then lists might not suck so much.
Ian, this was funny. I know how you feel about lists – I’ve been trying to avoid them ever since I realised that everyone is using them. Yet most people seem to like lists… sigh. I enjoyed reading this, but not for the list – for the clever humour!
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Ian’s reply:
Actually I’m quite fond of lists myself. I find I start them all the time, just rarely complete them. And yes, they are overused.
Hi Ian,
This post made me laugh…thank you!
I also have noticed that almost every blogger includes a list in their post. I am not a big list person because my brain just does not function in that way. I am not a linear thinker.
My theory is to just go with the flow when it comes to writing. If a list works with what you are inspired to write, then do it. Maybe most people are linear thinkers and that is the reason why so many love lists?
Hope all is well!
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Ian’s reply:
I don’t anyone is actually a linear thinker. I’m no expert but I guess it’s possible to discipline the mind to be more linear as basically thoughts are a chaotic mess. Lists could be one way we try to make sense out of the jumble (that’s for sure the role they play for me). Glad it made you laugh!
I have to admit that I LOVE lists…however. HOWEVER. They are often a derivative regurgitation of already existing information – and that aggravates me because it totally gives lists a bad name!
List of lists I would LOVE to see:
1. 5 Secret Signals That Indicate Your Husband/Wife is About to Explode Like an Angry Volcano
2. 7 Ways to Rock Bubble Wrap
3. 8 MacGuyver Emergency Alternatives to Toilet Paper
4. 10 Ways to Get a Massage Without Going to A Masseur
Oh yes, and…
5. 10 Reasons Why List Suck
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Ian’s reply:
Hayden, have you hacked my Wordpress dashboard and been peeking at my draft posts?!!!????
And are you serious about number 3? Is it MacGuyver or the toilet paper that’s the draw?
I agree with you on some points. Lists usage is inflated in the blogosphere and the same thing that happens to money when inflation hits happens to lists: they’re loosing their buying power. It’s more of a fashion thing and as any fashion thing it would be replaced by something even more fashionable.
Anti-lists, perhaps? You might even be the next big trend setter in the blogosphere?
And oh, I always appreciate open, quality (and even cheap) humor. I enjoyed your post
.
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Ian’s reply:
I’m convinced that in the unlikely event that I ever set a trend or fashion, it will certainly be an ‘anti-trend’ of some kind.
I find some lists really annoying and too general, its like 5 things to do right now:
1. smile more
2. go for a walk
3. drink more water
4. talk with your partner
5. do something you enjoy
I mean really we heard this 100 times before and why should I do any of this. This is not a one size fits all world.
I mean what if I am sitting at home with a broken leg or I have a disorder that doesn’t allow me to go outside?
Just my thoughts.
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Ian’s reply:
Your list is even funnier than mine. That is such a great condensation of the collective wisdom of at least 90% of the personal development blogs out there. It’s in fact not bad advice, just so often regurgitated. And you know what that’s like when you regurgitate often?
Btw .. if you do ever break your leg and you need to get out for a walk then you could always get a wheelchair. Or walk on your hands instead. Just saying
Funny, funny article.
Seriously, lists are SEO magnets. I won’t be surprised seeing this list coming up on Google searches.
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Ian’s reply:
Well I hope the Google searches are more focused that usual. I get a lot of visitors interested in smacking and I’m sure they’re not all parents looking for advice! If you know what I mean?
An interesting aside .. the spell checker on Wordpress doesn’t recognise ‘Google’. Or ‘Wordpress’ which is even more bizarre.
3 Reasons Why I Really Like Quantum Learning:
1. Ian is intelligent and thoughtful.
2. Ian teaches non-violence.
3. Ian is one hell of a funny guy!
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Ian’s reply:
Michael, you’re going to make my head grow to such extraordinary proportions it’s likely to burst! Seriously, I’m delighted you enjoy the site, and the author.
Hi Ian,
Very funny look at lists! Do I use them? Sometimes. Depends on what I’m doing. I can think of one event in particular where I’m up in front of a group of kids every month – and I do use a list to make sure I go over everything I want to with them. Although, it sometimes feels like I’m just reading to them, and not interacting. Which is a good reason to work away from the list. I’m not sure I’m ready yet, though…
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Ian’s reply:
Thanks Lance. Sure there are uses for lists. I do use them myself despite the post. I even have lists of posts I want to write.
Here is my list of alternatives to using lists:
(1) Mind Maps
Regards
Paul
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Ian’s reply:
I think this is even more amusing than my post! Made me laugh anyway. I LOVE mind maps and use them all the time. I guess they’re not so easily accessible as a blogging technique though. I have seen them used on blogs, but not that often.
I do the occasional list because one can’t argue – it works, especially in social media. But I know exactly what you mean.
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Ian’s reply:
They do work, indeed. Just overused, that’s all!
Thanks Ian, this is a very comical post, it made me smile!
Re Mind Maps and Blogging; try my Mind Map Blog at http://www.mindmapinspiration.com plus the IQ Matrix Blog at http://blog.iqmatrix.com/ both use Mind Maps within the Blog posts…and as you say there are others out there too.
Regards
Paul
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Ian’s reply:
Thanks for the links.
LOL! No, the draw is that almost everyone has been stuck in a public bathroom with no toilet paper.
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Ian’s reply:
Now I see! And somehow I wish I hadn’t. Public bathrooms? No toilet paper? Ughhh
Hi Ian
Oh I love it. And oh I hate lists.
Especially point 9.
Obviously they have their place, but, in personal development they often appear to have the same attitude of many in society:
There is a quick fix.
Cheers
Juliet
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Ian’s reply:
And quick fixes tend not to last very long.
I like lists Ian.
I know where to start and when I’m done.
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Ian’s reply:
Dee. This might have to go down as the first comment I’ve received disagreeing with me! And you do it so beautifully it doesn’t even seem like disagreement. lol
Hi, Ian! This is the ONLY list I’ve ever enjoyed reading.
I’m hoping Dragos is right on his prediction and that the list trend just fades away. If only they weren’t so SEO friendly… gotta be careful what you measure, ’cause that’s exactly what you are going to get. Someone discovered that list posts get page views, and now all we see are list posts!
Does anyone still READ… as in complete sentences and paragraphs? Everyone wants the answers to life’s biggest questions in 10 steps or less, and still formatted so they only have to read 20% of the words on the page!
Thanks for this post! Nice to know I’m not alone in my preferences.
=-)
“10 Sometimes number 9 happens before you even reach the final number and then you just look stupid.”
Made me laugh, Ian, thanks.
@Lisis Great points about people not reading whole sentences. The MTV culture of snippets of information. Eventually we’ll all talk in bullet points and numbered lists as our basic mode of communication!
@David Always a pleasure to hear I’ve brought a laugh to someone.
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